Bonner's Journal- Day 45. Released from fasting!

Feb 28. Day 45. 36th day of rehab.  

Today I was released from my complete fast.

I had set myself for 21 days of a complete fast (nothing but liquid) for my wife's healing. 21 days to the day turned out to be the our church's annual "camp meeting" (a week of gatherings each day & night). I was determined to see her healed and out of the hospital for that event...

However, I feel the weight of burden removed. I no longer feel the need to fast for her recovery! I am not excited that the fast is over...I am excited that my fast was effective!

God spoke through a Christian sister on Facebook a strong prophetic message to me " I have honored your requests". 

Hallelujah ! My fasting and prayers have reached heavens throne! My giving, praying and fasting have brought an answer from the Father.

I know this is similar to God speaking to Daniel through an angel: "Do not be afraid, Daniel. Since the first day that you set your mind to gain understanding and to humble yourself before your God, your words were heard, and I have come in response to them." (Daniel 10:12 NIV)

I know that victory is ahead!

 I feel a release of peace. I no longer have a burden to intercede for my marriage, our families promotion and our callings.

 I feel a burden to continue a restricted diet as I hold up our church body, the ministers coming to camp meeting, our city & county and country.

Bonner's Journal-Day 44. Using make-up again

Day 44. 35th day of rehab

Hannah had a small victory today. She was able to apply some makeup today, and brush her own teeth with the assistance of a flat board for her to lean her elbows on! Seems like a small thing to those of us who have full mobility...but to someone coming out of a month of paralysis, this is a MAJOR accomplishment.

Today's therapy was all balance and core stability work. Being a full time "personal trainer" for my football team has given me a level of respect for my precious bride. She is really working hard. I know how hard this must be for her.

Once, when she was in the kneeling lunge position she felt overwhelmed...being that her body was sending mixed messages... and she had a few small panic attacks...but I'm proud of her!

Bonner's Journal- Day 43. A decision of increase

Sun 26. Day 43. 34 days in rehab. 10th day of the fast.

After 34 days of living in the rehab center...and 10 days of fasting and prayer...

Hannah and I discussed an important understanding about our current and future state. 

We have made a decision to not accept one moment of decrease in what God has planned for our lives. Do we have to make an adjustment to a new outlook? Yes. 

Are we losing ground in our talents and gifts? Never!

We discussed that TODAY we are more prepared to help people in our area of profession than we ever have been, not tomorrow... Or a 

Month from now... Or a year from now. We refuse to lose, in any way.

We decide to increase in every aspect of our lives... Our faith, our emotions, our bodies, our relationships, our marriage, our finances, our profession, our children, our church body, our standing in the community we serve.

Scripture says that the gifts of God, and the call He has on our lives, He will not take back. 

So we are just as equipped to be loving leaders as we have ever been. I am more ready to be a head coach TODAY, right NOW, than I was before the enemy tried to kill my wife and steal from my family and I.

My wife is more able THIS DAY to serve in her profession, giving people joy and memorable experiences, than she was before her battle against paralysis.

We are determined to not back off. 

Our statement:

We are going to love more. We are going to give more. We are going to pray more. We are going to fast more. We are going to praise more. We are going to help more. We are going smile more. We are going to cry more. We are going to share the anchor of hope we have more. We are going to trust fellow Christians more. We are going to trust God more.

Bonner's Journal-day 42. Wait means anticipate

 Sat 25. Day 42. 

These weekends without Hannah have been a new challenge.

Even though I am not with Hannah in body, I am one with her in spirit. 

Another day of waiting. 

My Understanding of the concept of waiting is not just a worthless killing of time in some passive mental state of mind. Waiting is the same as HOPE. Waiting has great anticipation. Because our current waiting is on God, and not on what He can do for us, it is whole and complete.

I wait for the Lord, I expectantly wait, and in His word do I

                hope. (Psalm 130:5 AMP)

Bonner's Journal-Day 41. Noodle arms?

Fri 24. Day 41. 32 days in rehab. 8 days of fasting. 

Today the doctor told Hannah "when I first saw your lack of arm strength, they were like noodles, and I was really scared. But now I see how much progress you have made and I am amazed. Whatever you  have been doing keep doing it."

Hannah had a really tough morning. She almost fell off the bed, had to call for several nurses to run into her room, and realized the dangers of her current spasticity. This resulted in a enduring battle within her mind and emotions for most of the evening.

HOWEVER, she has reported that she "started a new beginning today". She said that something was different in her body today when walking. The PT took her outside for the first time, she walked unassisted with her walker, and she felt for the first time that she was doing the walking and not just her body going through the motions! Hallelujah !

Bonner's Journal-Day 40. A week of fasting

Thurs 23. Day 40. 31 days of rehab. 7th day of my fast.

Over the past month of rehab I have seen numerous patients come into this rehabilitation facility... and then leave. My heart has ached for their pain and suffering as I have watched them struggle to regain their lives back, just like Hannah. I have observed their fight , and have been silently  engaged as their cheerleader ...at moments I've been absolutely filled with compassion.

What would be a normally frustrating fact , that we are not yet seeing full healing as we expect each morning, has been a hidden blessing. We haven't gone home  yet, but so many around us have....it has played games in my mind. 

Patience Bonner ! Let patience have its perfect work, so that I may be complete, lacking nothing.

This "live in" therapy is a grind, but a necessity for her future wellness. Intensive training , all day, 6 days a week. God is obviously  on a different timeline. He is Lord of the harvest.

Bonner's Journal-Day 39. Father son time

February 22- Day 39

 

Today I did something as a dad that I have never done, I took one of our children on a field trip. 

What an amazing lesson to learn, that God ALWAYS turns a rough situation into a Blessing lesson...if our hearts are truly open for any guidance, correction, and changes He might bring.

In a matter of one night I have gone from football coach to field trip dad. 

In the blink of an eye I went from managing 300 students and 150 athletes to managing laundry, meals and the continuity of my family full time.

Wow!

Isn't Life a challenge? And we better be ready to adjust, and do that without stress, worry or frustration.

 This attack on my wife's life has provided many opportunities for God's hand to work, one of them is providing Bodee and I quality father son time.

I realize that many people miss the truth about God. It is sad that many believe a foolish doctrine. They are deceived to believe that a God who is good, and enjoys extravagant riches and health in heaven...would take everything away from you and  make you sick, to teach you something about who He is. 

This is nonsense.

 No wonder why people don't want to serve our God! I wouldn't either if I thought that were true.

No, God is good and the devil is bad. It is so simple even my 8 year old son can understand what happens to us in this life. See John 10:10

Bonner's Journal-Day 38. A Writer's gift

February 21- Day 38. 

Yesterday was a day of Patience.

I have also submitted to the new ministry opportunity that my wife has asked of me. She has asked me to Journal her story and then publish them in a Blog. She has demanded that it be told. No matter how humiliating the reality, she wants me to record the lessons that God is teaching us- for others.

I remember  several years ago when the prophet Larry Huggins prayed for me to receive the gift of writing, ultimately for the kingdom of God. Here I am today, facing the opportunity to use my family's horrible challenge as a method for telling the goodness of God. The words of the prophet Huggins were correct! I hope that our life, and the pages of this online journal, can bring someone closer to the God who loves them.

This makes me ponder the purpose of blessings and prosperity. God does not heal, provide prosperity, or give greater insight for the sole purpose of making us comfortable. 

He is not against our being comfortable, but He increases us with these blessings so that we will increase the distribution of His promises and the advancement of His kingdom. More service is always the reason for promotion. If you won't use it for His purposes, He will never give you more. Are you in need of a promotion? Then you had better take a long hard look at every area of your life...and see if you have been truly faithful. Use it or lose it. 

So I am currently thinking PRODUCTION. If I was truly gifted with the ability to write for Jesus, then its time to produce.

The bible asks a stunning statement: "who can find a faithful man?" This implies that being faithful with what you are given is a rare thing with man kind.

Am I really faithful with the gifts and talents that He has given me?

looks like I am a bit excited

Bonner's Journal-Day 37. I am starving!

February 20th. Day 37.

I personally feel the same gravity that I see the children display. Our lives are in an odd state of flux, and we are desperate for the Lord to reveal Himself .To spend time with the Holy One, I woke and went for a jog as the sun came up.


Today is 4th day that I have refused all food...and I am starving!
But what needs to be made clear is that I am starving for God's presence. I am hungry for Him to be made more real to me. The hunger that my physical body is experiencing pales in comparison to my hunger for God's love. I have had it MANY times before, and I need it now more than ever.


You might ask, "Is it possible to FEEL God?"
Yes, we can learn by experience that "in His presence is fullness of joy."


The Christian has the ability to have a continual experience with God's person. I can report that this experience is more real than talking with someone face to face. The depth of joy and love that is felt cannot be matched anywhere else in this world. I know, I've tried.


 just like David said...

As the hart panteth after the water brooks, so panteth my soul after thee, O God. My soul thirsteth for God, for the living God: when shall I come and appear before God? Why art thou cast down, O my soul? and why art thou disquieted within me? hope thou in God: for I shall yet praise him, who is the health of my countenance, and my God. (Psalm 42:1, 2, 11 KJV)

Bonner's Journal-Day 36. One month from fusion

February 19- Day 36.

It has been one month from the fusion surgery.

We have spent 27 days in this rehabilitation center. I would never imagine that my wife wouldn't come home that night of the accident...for a month!

This is the  3rd day of my fast.

I realize that we are officially in the receiving mode. God is greatly concerned with every detail of our life, and so we completely rest in Him and take what He is offering. We grab hold of His new offer for us. We say "yes" to this new journey and where it leads.

Full peace.

Humility ends all striving, when focused on Him. We ARE healed...in heart, mind and emotions. Full resurrection in our marriage and family. We give Him full permission to do anything He desires with us.

 Today was the most difficult visit that the kids have had yet

When the kids are away from their mother they have the ability to become engrossed in their daily life, which is good for them. However, when they see their mother at the hospital (usually on a Sunday) they are reminded of what they cannot have, and they act out. It tears my heart apart to see such pain in my family, but I know that we will be made so much stronger from this ordeal.

Bonner's Journal-Day 35. Planning our new life

February 18. Day 35

Today is the 2nd day of my fast. 
I am feeling strong and focused on the call of God on our marriage, children and upcoming ministry. Fighting hunger has prepared my heart for anything that God may want to do with us. 

God asked  "Whom shall I send?"... Isaiah said, "Here I am, send me!"

I say the same. 

I want to be used by Him. I want to be useful to my King. I willingly sacrifice ALL for your purposes, Lord.
 
We spent this entire Saturday planning and bringing order to our home. My aunt, our Nanni, the kids and I discussed over the course of seven hours, every aspect of our home life and how we are going to follow the spirit of wisdom and organization. God is clearly trimming our family back and building our lives on His solid foundation. We are seeing the beginnings of order.

What great thing does He have in store for us? How different is our future walk with Him, that He would completely restart our entire life? 

All involved intimately with our journey can see the hand of God on this new beginning.

Bonner's Journal-Day 34. The fast begins

February 17. Day 34

 Learning to walk all over again

God has pressed the restart button on our lives. 

New Beginnings is upon us. 

Plow deeply Lord! Tear up that which is hardened against you.

Today I began a 21 day liquid fast for Hannah, for our family and for the call of God on our lives. 
Jesus said, "Blessed are they which do hunger and thirst after righteousness: for they shall be filled."

I am one of those He is describing. This passage is describing where Bonner Cunnings is in his life right now. I am HUNGRY for God's plan. I THIRST for His way of living. I desire His correction, teaching and equipping more than food!
 
The kids also began a fast today for Hannah. I am amazed at the maturity level of my young family. I have never heard of children who would skip meals so that they could press God for their needs. I am so proud of them. They are learning to be conquerors.
I am fasting from food because I need to know the right way to go with our life. We came too close to death for me to just shrug this off. I have had my reality check.

I cannot be confused about the future choices that lie ahead.



I am refusing all food, seeking God's face and trusting that He is guiding me. Because fasting is something that Jesus said to do, I know that I am correct in using this form of concentration to clearly see the direction for my family. 

The children and I prayed a prayer of agreement (Matthew 18:19) that she will have gained everything she needs in her soul from the Lord, she will have gained everything she needs in her body from therapy, and be released in time to be at our churches yearly camp meeting.

Her therapy today presented a challenge, that proved to shake her to the core of her soul. The simple task of  stepping onto a small box was overwhelming, causing her to break down with weeping. I got a small glimpse of how much of a test this entire journey is on her mind, will and emotions.

Oh God, have your glory in my wife! Strengthen her for the battle you have assigned to her in the future.

Bonner's Journal-Day 33. Fancy Braid

February 16. Day 33 

 No matter how miserable the neck brace is, Hannah is still smiling

33 days in the hospital, 24 days of rehab. Our life is truly starting over from scratch.

Patience with Gods perfect timing of things, and full effort with what we find in our power to do. Soften our heart to receive what you are desiring to plant, Lord!

I am truly amazed at the medical &therapy staff and their knowledge of how the body works. Their ability to accurately diagnose what Hannah's body is doing and assign accurate movements that rehabilitate each and every muscle group is phenomenal. I am increasing in my knowledge of the body each day. I can see how this field is at the other end of the spectrum of what I do with athletes.
How magnificent is Gods intricate creation! Such wisdom in the field of healing!

I am constantly hearing the OT/PT report how Hannah is capable of doing more than the day before, which is a good sign that her therapy is effective and still needed. The doctor even said that her progress is as if she is going up stairs multiple steps/accomplishments at a time. 

Exponential progress is the result of Hannah's unswerving effort and complete hope in God. 

I tried to get credit for braiding her hair, but none of the nurses were fooled

Bonner's Journal-Day 32. God is NOT in control

February15. Day 32

Thank you Lord for making repairs on our life...Physical repairs, Mental repairs and repairs to our relationships. Repairs that are necessary for survival.

As it is with so many people, the enemy has taken illegal residence in our life. He has cleverly worked his way into the way we think, the way we talk, the habits we have, the decisions we make...so that we cannot defend ourselves against his attacks on our own, without the help of God.
I hate the devil so much, because he is so good at destroying lives. Just look at the amount of evil, perversion and injustice that has filled our world. It is so obvious that there is something terribly wrong! We have an enemy. Whether you see him or not is the clincher.

"God is in control"...people say.  But that statement is not completely true. God is NOT in control over all things on this earth and the things that are happening here. If He were in control He is doing a lousy job! NO, people are in control of their life, and they make decisions every day that ruin their life and many others! They are deceived, trapped and blinded into life destroying decisions...by their invisible enemy, Satan.

God has delegated dominion and authority on earth to humans...He is not a thief, He is not going to take back what He has given to us. He has given us all the ammunition we need to overcome everything that this horrible world could throw at us... in His simple little book. Every single answer is there for every person on earth to have total victory.

Why don't you read it?

God is not some puppet master in the sky who decided to smash Hannah head on in a car wreck to teach her a lesson. He was not in control of that car...however He DOES get involved when we ask Him! Because we invited Him into our life, He was involved in protecting Hannah...in protecting my marriage...in protecting my children's future...in protecting our impact on this world.

He can only help those who invite Him. He can only assist those who ask for it. He is a gentlemen...He doesn't barge His way into your life. He must be asked. Isn't that what you would want? Don't you want people to invite you into their friendship?

In Matthew 6:9-10 Jesus tells us what we should expect here on earth. He tells us to EXPECT HEAVEN ON EARTH. What does heaven look like? Do people go paralyzed? Do people have trouble walking? Are people in pain? Are people sad and depressed?
No, they are not...and we shouldn't be either. We are to pray that our lives on earth will mimic what it looks like in heaven!

I want to live in His heavenly will, right now. So I give God control. He has permission to take full control over the Cunning's life. I relinquish all control, and hand it over to Him. I am learning the hard way that I cannot control my life.

Are you smart enough to relinquish control?

Bonner's Journal-Day 31. Kids back to school

February 14. Day 31

Today is Hannah's 22nd day of rehab.

God is repairing many holes in our existence, through His loving hand.
Today is the first day of school for our children in over a month. They have been privileged to be at their grandparents for a month (Hannah's accident was January the 14th). Sheltering them from the harsh reality that my wife and I are facing is a good thing. Children need to be free from the burden of care. They will have plenty of time to absorb the upcoming challenges that we will face.

Yesterday and last night we established what the operation of the home will be like with mommy gone, today we began our new journey. Getting back to our "normal" routine won't be the same without my wife, but we must piece our lives back together.

Everyone is excited to go back to school, especially when the entire school is celebrating their return with a Valentines party!

Bonner's Journal-Day 30. Be a man!

February, 13. Day 30

Getting my house in order.
Help, God!

I have been living the fasted life since we began this journey. I have never fasted before, so this entire process is new to me...but one that I MUST take. Desperation for the voice of God has consumed me.

Through fasting, prayer, study, praise and reflection I have asked God to dig into the deepest part of my being as I go about being the head of this household. Oh, God! Search out my heart!

Have I ever really been a leader? Have I ever done ALL that I knew in my heart that I should? Why would I wait until tragedy strikes to find God's desire for my family? Really allow HIM to show me what a husband-father looks like?

So many opportunities to teach and train my children in Godly living have been presented to me, it boggles my mind. I see teachable moments everywhere.


How many times have I overlooked the opportunity to be a dad? How many moments have I let slip through my fingers? What was I focused on all these years? How many times did my own heart convict me that I needed to change?

The reality of being a failing father is disgusting! 

I REFUSE to be a loser who selfishly seeks his own. I REFUSE to go after a life of self, and leave my family to fend for themselves. I REFUSE to justify in my mind that I deserve to make myself feel good, when I know in my heart that I am to seek my families needs first. I REFUSE to be a lazy slob who hides behind the lie that "I go to work and provide for my family." I REFUSE to lie to myself. I REFUSE to remain a coward. I REFUSE to hide behind my family when I know I should be walking out the role He has called me to be in my profession and social position. I REFUSE to act religious, when I know I am to be a warrior!

God said, "Husbands love your wives (and children) just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her." 

Did you get that Bonner? Jesus DIED for the church...you are to DIE for your wife and children! Jesus showed His love by giving up His desires for the church...you are to give away your selfish motives and serve your family. Jesus proved love by doing what was difficult, you are to do the same.

Why don't we start with the way you SPEAK to your wife and family, Bonner?...do you speak to them in the loving tone that Jesus talks to the church? Do your words reflect His love?

There are so many weaklings out there...that call themselves men, but do not do what men are supposed to do. I REFUSE to be one of them.

Here is what men do:
Men lay down their life. Men serve. Men make the extra effort. Men do the tasks that no one wants to do. Men go the distance for their wives and children, even when it is uncomfortable. Men refuse to seek their own pleasure, but choose the well being of their families first. Men spend unending hours searching their own hearts for selfishness...then they destroy it. Men live a quest for excellence. Men live a life of transparency. Men snitch on their own sin to their wives, so that sin has no hiding place.  Men get their own house in order, then they reach out to other men to do the same.

No more excuses. Step up and be a man. Quit blaming. Quit justifying. Quit whining & complaining. Are you a man or not? What did God make you to be? 

Where are all the men?


Wake up Bonner!
Wake up husband!
Wake up father!

I  choose to become a better man. Complete humility. Complete renovation of this house, gutting it out, down to the rock on which my foundation stands...Jesus the ultimate man. No one ever gave as much as He did. He is my hero. I choose to do what He did.

I know that with my surrender, as the leader of this house, God can direct our steps into greatness. Wherever He is taking this Christ-centerd family is going to be big!

Bonner's Journal-Day 29. 5 year old strength

February, 12. Day 29

Woke up in my own bed alone. 

Difficult night without Hannah, but my 5 year old son came in and spent the night with me. I know it is selfish, but I drew much comfort from him. I recognize in myself how adults so often "pull" from their children....because I am pulling from my own. I know it is backward, but I am gaining strength from being with my children.

Who can Hannah pull from on nights like these? Only you Holy Spirit. Without you being with her I would be concerned for her well being. Please comfort her.

Another challenge the children and I faced when we got home was an empty propane tank! 

How is this happening? No heat, no hot water, no cooking, no showers. My life is really being challenged right now....it is laughable.



Being that it is Sunday the children and I went to church and then had our family visit with Hannah. 

Good afternoon, especially when my aunt gave her a new pair of pink and white coach sneakers... we were able to show the family her ability to stand up.

Bonner's Journal-Day 28. Break to Starbucks

February 11, Day 28

Her first out to eat visit today, we pushed her several blocks to Starbucks for a great few hours of conversation and snacks

Today is our 19th day in the rehabilitation center. Could you have ever imagined that you would spend 19 days away from your wife?...let alone with her in a rehab facility fighting for her life?

We learned through their educational sessions that the "spinal shock stage" usually lasts 6-8 weeks, post surgery date. That means that if her surgery was on the 19th of January then she should be in a critical state until March. This is helpful to know.

According to the physicians after she moves out of this phase of recuperation it is very important to carefully watch: Frequent urination, regular bowel function, deep breathing, appropriate body temperature regulation and be on the watch for any significant swelling below the knee (clots).

Tonight is the first night for the kids and I to go home since her accident.

Thank you Lisa for being a true friend!
Your Loving efforts for my wife will never be forgotten....especially breaking us out for a Starbucks

Bonner's Journal- Day 27. End of Influence

February10, Day 27

Today is the day that I resigned my teaching & coaching position at Lemoore High School. I announced a meeting early in the week, and then met with them today. I was not prepared for the reaction that I would see...not even close.

There was much crying and hugs from my team, my coaches and fellow teachers.




Obviously the love that I gave them had an effect on them. I guess I never knew how much INFLUENCE I was actually having. Is it normal for a football coach to have his staff and team weep at his departure? I don't know...but I am hurting as much as they are.

Only God can provide the kind of strength that it took to face this task, and actually tell the men and boys that I love goodbye... especially when we just got started. We had a dream.

As I have felt about every school that I have coached at, I love these people.
I have always given myself to the community of people that I serve in the arena of football. Football for me is about mentoring young people in a time of their life when they so badly need it. Football for me is about helping parents send their young men into young adulthood with some tools of character. Football for me is about teaching boys how to sacrifice their desires for the good of others. I guess I have been attempting to teach them how to be a man, the way God intends.

I have seen more ACTIVE love from the Lemoore community than I have ever seen before, and I have only been working as their head football coach for one year. It is one thing to say "Oh, let me know what you need Bonner, whatever it is... we will help your family." It is another thing for them to actually make painful sacrifices for my family. It is true love when they put their own lives in a position that is uncomfortable. They have made an unswerving effort to actually DO something helpful.  Not just talk, but action. This is love.

It amazes me what people are capable of! Who had ever heard of a school district donating 60 plus days of their personal sick days to their football coach? Unheard of. This is what they did for my family!

 My football team going into the playoffs. We were chosen as the valley's team of the week!

Lemoore you are truly a quality people. I owe you my complete respect and admiration. I will always tell of your loving actions. I expect that you will forever have a great man to lead your sons to be men of character through the sport of football.

Bonner's Journal- Day 26. God our source

February 9, Day 26

I am so excited, because God is our source. 

If I were to depend on my ability to put our life back together, we wouldn't make it. If I were to reach forward into our future and prepare the way, it wouldn't turn out right. If I were to pick the exact day that my wife is made whole, I would miss many opportunities for growth. I am glad that I cannot make it turn out.


But GOD is my source. I don't think that settled into your heart Bonner...the Almighty God Himself is who is taking care of you! He has your life already set up. He is not wringing His hands in heaven, worried about what He is going to do with you, your marriage and your family. No! He has your supply set aside. What ever the need is, He has promised that you can depend on Him. Trust Him.

Ok then. I will have complete dependence on you, Lord! 

Oh, how important it is to "cast our cares" on you. I obey your command. I refuse to care. I refuse to worry. I refuse to give one moment of my thought in anxious concern. I don't have a care in the world. Why? Because I gave them all to Jesus! I have literally unloaded all my frustrations onto Him. I have said, "Here you go God, you take them." I throw my worries at God. I am not holding one thought of fear. Not one doubt will be in my mind.

I think of my family as healthy and whole again, back at our river camp!

Much of my efforts today were spent on piecing our lives back together, and reassuring Hannah that she will be ok. I have spent most of my energies today calling/discussing the dynamics of getting the children back home and enrolled in school again, while calming Hannah's fears of being left behind. 

She has been very resistant to any change, and for good reason. If I were her I would not want to be left alone in the hospital either...let alone with her helpless condition. 

However, she is not fully aware of how disturbing it is for our children to be out of our normal routine. With time she will understand more. This is ok,  I expect her to remain focused on herself completely. I am able to carry the family until she can return. It is time though for a change, the kids cannot be uprooted from their life any longer.  I can see it in their faces. Even though my extended family has done an amazing job in caring for them, and I am so very grateful for their loving help, I need to return my children to their "normal" routine.

The doctors are saying that she will probably need another month of therapy, which will extend her hospital stay. Our lives must continue to move forward. Painful reality.